Perhaps you have heard of the legendary Patronicus, the legendary Krath alchemist and warlord. Every year, we celebrate his life and death with a festive night, where everyone acts like Bob for a night. Here, you'll learn about his story.
Patronicus was born around 385 on Caledon, probably close to Kilpatrick. His parents were Calpurnius and Conchessa, who were Old Republic Troops living in Caledon in charge of the colonies.
As a boy of fourteen or so, Patronicus was captured during a raiding party and taken to Xeire as a slave to herd and tend livestock. Xeire at this time was a land of crude primitives. He learned the language and practices of the people who held him.
During his captivity, he turned to the Dark Side. He wrote: "The love of power and his fear grew in me more and more, as did the dark side, and my soul was rosed, so that, in a single day, I have studied as many as a hundred techniques and in the night, nearly the same."
"I trained in the woods and on the mountain, even before dawn. I felt no hurt from the snow or ice or rain."
Patronicus' captivity lasted until he was twenty, when he escaped after having a dream in which he was told to leave Xeire by going to the coast near his captivity. There he found some smugglers who took him back to Caledon, where he reunited with his family.
He had another dream in which the people of Xeire were calling out to him "We beg you, Dark One, to come and walk among us once more."
He began his studies for the knighthood. He was tried by Germanus, the Epis of Auxerre, whom he had studied under for years.
Later, Patronicus was ordained an Archpriest, and was sent to take over Xeire. He arrived in Xeire March 25, 433, at Slane. One legend says that he met a chieftain of one of the tribes, who tried to kill Patronicus. Patronicus converted Dichu (the chieftain) after he was unable to move his arm until he became friendly to Patronicus, using his formidable Dark Side prowess to show the chieftain exactly who was in charge.
As he brought his alchemy to the long forgotten planet, he also discovered a process involving native plants that yeilded a particularly useful product...Alcohol. This tool became a quite useful moral booster, and gave his men an advantage in that they felt less pain, and cared not about overwhelming odds against them, creating a formidable army of darksiders.
Patronicus began his conquest throughout Xeire, causing countless force sensitives to fall to the Dark side. He and his disciples converted thousands and began building great temples all over the planet. Kings, their families, and entire kingdoms fell to his armies upon hearing Patratronicus terms.
Patronicus by now had many disciples, among them Beningnus, Auxilius, Iserninus, and Fiaac, all of whom attained the rank of Archpriest.
He died near Saul, where he had built the first temple.
His secrets passed on through the Krath in a more or less direct line to Clan Naga Sadow, and as you all know, our predilection for drink helps impress our dominance over others.
In other words, have a drink tonight in Patronicus' name.
Arh, here be one to 'ole Patronicus matey!
He must be cool if he was an alchemist, maybe we're related!
I'll drink enough for the order to celebrate Patronicus! Here's to one of the greatest of the Krath order.
How exactly did he die?
It was either old age, or liver failure, i forget.
In honor of Patronicus, one of Sadow's resident alchemists has recently completed a new device. This device, the Sith Alcoholocron has the ability to produce alcohol of any sort the user desires. The user simply concentrates on their dark desires, and they are fulfilled in a glass. Thus, many can celebrate the holiday properly with the Alcoholocron. Yes, it can produce
scotch as well as sake, and the creator's favorite, Yavin Four moonshine.
It will be installed in the Palace.
Macron, way to go...
although i would have kept it secret. That things going to get positively destroyed after tonight's activities.
Let's just hope Bob didn't hear about it, or his cowboy arse is going to be riding that thing like goat rides hutts.
I'm sure Bob is too drunk to even be able to read what Macron just put
you have a point there, knight Vortex.
better than being a dumbass, i suppose...
*looks round for a victim to slap with her saber*
I love a good laugh! I bet Bob wears it out like an old screen door.
well I'll make sure I raise one up to old Patty when I get to the king's tonight.