Makurth Mandalore

13-06-2007 23:57:48

How the years fly by
When you're having fun,
Being with your friends,
On the beach, in the sun.

The work was hard
But I guess it paid off.
And just look at us now,
Ready to take off.

It's been four fun years,
Filled with many emotions.
But the love we hold for each other
Could span many oceans.

I remember back
To that very first year-
You took my hand,
And I no longer felt fear.

All through these years
You've been there for me,
And it scares me that you
I'll no longer see.

I'm off to something
Exiting and new.
But I'm afraid to
Be doing it without you.

You, my friend,
Who has always been there.
Where will you be?
The thought I cannot bear.

But you'll be starting
Your own adventure, too.
Who knows what that is
Other than something new.

And when we graduate,
And hug, and cry,
Know that I will miss you,
And that it hurts to say good-bye.


04-07-2007 14:56:14

Just graduated from high school? :)

This poem is very reminiscent of "the good times," the days one will always remember because they had such an enormous impact on our developing life stories.

I especially like the imagery used in stanzas one, two, three... well, throughout the whole poem! The entire piece is awesome in that it just overwhelms my senses.

One suggestion, though: What about the bad times? The sadness, disappointment, suicidal thoughts? Everybody has them. In my personal opinion, if you include those experiences into this poem the same magnificent way you did with the other feelings, it would strengthen the feeling of friendship and love that is emanated from these words.

Excellent, no, superb! Such words are mere shrimp compared to the towering skyscraper that this poem builds.

Congratulations. You should be proud that you wrote such a wonderful poem.

Makurth Mandalore

07-07-2007 03:15:40

Thanks, Revenge! We had to write a poem about what how we felt on our last day of school in English IV and I submitted that. The teacher loved it!!