Ark Dowell

28-07-2005 21:05:15

Here's a story. Read and comment if you want. Only the first part's available, though. I'll add more over time. It'll get funnier.

Excavation Report_1

Okay, here's part 2. I realized one of my chars is named after a battleteam. This was a coincidence.



03-08-2005 03:08:53

Very nice, Ark. You obviously have no problem with attention to detail. A couple of things you could work on, though.

First, you must learn to embrace the spellchecker. I consider myself an above average speller, and I still make mistakes myself. It can be tough to spot them, especially when you are proofreading your own work.

My second suggestion is that you vary your sentence structure a bit. You are primarily relying on simple sentences, complimented by a few complex sentences, mostly during the dialogue. Try throwing a few 'and's into the narration, connect a few sentences with it. Simple sentences are fine, but if you rely on one structure, it becomes borring.

I look forward to the next edition. KotOR is one of my favorite fan-fic plots.

Ark Dowell

03-08-2005 03:53:18

Oh, thx for the suggestions, BruGuy. I know, I'm still working on this like a 'sidedish.' I won't really update it until the 'big comps' are all done. Thanks for reading, though! ^_^

EDIT- Funny thing, I didn't really want anyone to read this. Kinda embarrasing later on. And I love KOTOR! I always go light, though...


08-08-2005 15:30:26

*tyrus shamefully admits it*

the light side is more fun, cause bastila wont eat you :P

Ark Dowell

08-08-2005 21:22:45

Bastila tries to eat you? *shocked* Lol, jk. :P